Edwin Rommel

but at leazt your mornink haz not yet broken....

unt vhe haf no vheapons of mazz destrukzion-- az a matter of fact vhe barely haf vheaponz of minor diztrukzion....

Panelz looks fine, but the plane is too clean-- like Keck zhaiz... Weather the leading edges of the wings some more???

Thought zho-- zhorry Stanz... But zhiz ist zhe dezert unt vaser ist scarce... Shultz? Wee on Stanzez fire.....

Vhell- logic zhaiz if zhe propellorz are turnink zhe vrong vhay zhe planez muzt be flyink in reverze... Ja?

At leazt zhe Avengerz ist flying in zhe right direkzion-- juzt imagine zhe zhurprize if you taken-off in zhe vrong direkzion!!

It'z time vhe zhend him on leaf-- he ist mating mit zhe Upoko'z now.....

Zhertainly zhoundz like it.... Unt vhot ist zhat schmell of burnink ragz ich schmell???

Zhe troopz vhill be mad about zhe idea.. let'z zhen zhem in!!

At leazt he ist not uzink mein kredit kard to buy everybody drinkz like zhome elze in zhiz thread....

Ach-- Ich juzt luv zhe schmell of half digezted beanz in zhe mornink... (Zhey vhill later uze zhiz famouz line of mine in ein film-- but zhey vhill change "beanz" mit "napalm"")

Zhe little schperm haz arrived.... now vhere ist zhe ova??? Happy schwimmink Bilkerz!!

Haf guuut tjourney Keck!! Bzzzttt-- Adler einz, do you haf ko-ordinatez of zhe train?" "Ja Tomato Einz" "Kode ist Angreif-- wiederholen angreif-- make zhoze bomben vhork-- unt keep eyez open für Indianer!"

unt vhe talk zho much of it allvready!!

Ahhh- Dumela-- Ukai? Kiteng, Wena Ukia?- Limnakiteng, haie akulula ukuthetha isiXhosa!

Vhell--- zhat dependz on dein pozt kountz......

Did you kontribute in any vhay to zhe refreshmentz Specciez????

Zhe Kolonic period iz pazt in Afrika....

Funny-- zhe schowerz givez me gaz

on zhe ozzer hand if ich run kloze enough to zhem zhey haf chance of hitting zhemzhelvez-- Brilliant Stanz!!!

Problem mit dein schtarter motor???

1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic! Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto! The blockage will be almost instantly removed. 2. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away. 3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by simply using the sink. 4. For high blood pressure sufferers: just cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. 5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button. 6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough. 7. Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you will forget about the toothache. 8. Sometimes, we just need to remember what the rules of life really are: 9. You only need two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape. 10. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them. 11. Never pass up an opportunity to go to the bathroom. 12. If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You get another chance. 13. And finally, be really nice to your family and friends, you never know when you might need them to empty your bedpan. Guuut mornink!

JA-- Ich thought it vhoz juzt me... zhorry....

Zhorry-- thought he vhould be more underschtandable if vhe schout at him.....