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Wednesday's funny


Stans
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Last Halloween, little Johnny dressed up like a pirate with a big hat, knee boots, a broomstick for a sword, and a patch over his left eye.

His mom asked him who he was.

Little Johnny replied "I'm a pirate".

Then his mom asked "Where are your buccaneers?

Little Johnny quipped "Under my buckin hat."

Thank you, thank you, I'll be appearing all week. Be sure to try the veal. :D

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Actually, it should say, "boucaniers" but then that would ruin the whole joke, wouldn't it? The pirates were called that because of their habit of smoking pork to make jerky, and the French nicknamed them boucan(for bacon)-iers. Just thought you'd like to know. Carry on.

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By golly, I think Stans has been taking nite classes at the local High School! Where else could he have picked up a joke like that?

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Yeah...I'm back! I know how much you all missed me. And missed me. And missed me. With some new software and updated hardware, I am back to keep you all entertained with my great wit and humor. Not to mention hassle that old fart Whizdowntheleg. So without further delay...

Captain Flint was on the lookout for buried treasure.

After months of hard sailing, his ship caught sight of land -- the land to which his treasure map had been leading.

He and Billy Bones disembarked on the island to search out the buried treasure, which was supposed to lie hidden deep within a swamp at the center of the island.

Sure enough, at the center of the island was a swamp, and Flint and Bones bravely entered the swamp.

Soon the swamp began to get deeper, and the pirates' feet, then ankles, and finally entire leg below the knees was covered in swamp.

It was at that time that Flint banged his shin against something hard. He reached down, searched around, and pulled up a treasure chest.

Prying the lock open, the chest revealed gold and jewels beyond imagination!

Flint turned to Bones and said, "Arrrr, matey, that just goes to show ye, that booty is only shin deep!"

:P

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What? Who? Where? What happened? All of a sudden I felt light headed, then it was something like an evil spirit was lifted from me. Oh, it's Dark Helmet. I see he has his own body again. I guess that means he will no longer be controlling my jokes. Whew!

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