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Joke of the Day! 09-22-04


Donster
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A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly her husband burst into the kitchen.

"Careful ... CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK! Careful ... CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up!

Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt USE THE SALT! THE SALT!"

The wife stared angrily at him and snapped. "What the hell is wrong with you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"

The husband calmly replied, "I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving".

:D

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:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

About a year after me and the wife got married, we went to visit her parents in Maryland. It was a wonderful trip all around, till we got into Georgia, about 2 hours from home. We ran into a thunderstorm, and I could tell it wouldn't last more than a half hour at worst. I got into the left lane, set myself behind a semi doing about 50, and just chilled. My wife, God bless her, has no depth perception at all, and was freaking out. I could see just fine, but she couldn't, and was demanding, no, screaming at me to pull over in the emergency lane and stop till the rain eased up. I tried to explain why that was a real bad idea, and that what I was doing was as safe as safe gets, but to no avail. Finally, I had enough. I told her, in a clear and strong voice, "I've got the answer to your being scared at what you can't see out the windshield...JUST SHUT YOUR EYES, AND SHUT YOUR MOUTH, AND QUIT DISTRACTING ME, AND WE'LL BE OUT OF THE RAIN BEFORE YOU KNOW IT!"

She did...and we did get out of the rain shortly...and about a week later, she spoke to me again ;)

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