Donster Posted October 16, 2004 Report Share Posted October 16, 2004 SIGNS YOUR HOSPITAL HAS RECENTLY GONE THROUGH BUDGET CUTS The stethoscopes have been replaced with two tin cans and a piece of string. The X-Ray machine is now a 500-watt bulb and an Instant Camera. The call button is a bicycle horn. Dinner is Jello® in the shape of a steak. The orderlies will only change your bedding if you leave them a tip. The medical gowns have no back ... and no front. You can only have blood drawn if you're already bleeding. "This month only! 50% off stitches in our do-it-yourself wing!" The pediatric and geriatric wards have been combined to save storage space on diapers. Your oxygen tent is two garbage bags and some duct tape. Coin-operated bedpans. All medications are supplied by Placebo, Inc. Uneaten food is now saved until it molds, which the pharmacy then turns into antibiotics. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts