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Jokes (26 FEBRUARY) 2006


Dark Helmet
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After the last child was born, she told me we had to cut back on expenses & I had to give up drinking beer.

I was not a big drinker, maybe a 12 pack on weekends.

Anyway, I gave it up but I noticed the other day she came home from grocery shopping & when I looked at the receipt & saw $45 in makeup, I said "Wait a minute. I've given up beer & you haven't given up anything!"

She said "I buy that makeup so I can look pretty for you."

I told her "Hell, that's what the beer was for!"

I don't think she'll be back.

:D

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> THE DECEASED DOG

> Muldoon lived alone in the Irish countryside with only a pet dog

> for company. One day the dog died, and Muldoon went to the parish

> priest and asked, "Father, me dog is dead. Could ya be sayin' a mass

> for the poor creature?"

> Father Patrick replied, "I'm afraid not; cannot have services for

> an animal in the church. But there are some Baptists down the lane,

> and there's no tellin' what they believe. Maybe they'll do something

> for the creature."

> Muldoon said, "I'll go right away Father Do ya think $5,000 is

> enough to donate to them for the service?"

> Father Patrick exclaimed, "Sweet Mary, Mother of Jesus! Why didn`t

> ya tell me the dog was Catholic?"

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> THE DECEASED DOG

> Muldoon lived alone in the Irish countryside with only a pet dog

> for company. One day the dog died, and Muldoon went to the parish

> priest and asked, "Father, me dog is dead. Could ya be sayin' a mass

> for the poor creature?"

> Father Patrick replied, "I'm afraid not; cannot have services for

> an animal in the church. But there are some Baptists down the lane,

> and there's no tellin' what they believe. Maybe they'll do something

> for the creature."

> Muldoon said, "I'll go right away Father Do ya think $5,000 is

> enough to donate to them for the service?"

> Father Patrick exclaimed, "Sweet Mary, Mother of Jesus! Why didn`t

> ya tell me the dog was Catholic?"

Thats no joke...that be fact! :lol:

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